Sincere Milk & Solid Food

Tag: Relational Idolatry⁠

  • The Capacity of Worship: Why No Human Shoulder Can Bear the Weight of an Idol

    The Capacity of Worship: Why No Human Shoulder Can Bear the Weight of an Idol

    In my journey of dismantling personal idolatry, I have had to confront altars I didn’t even realize I had built.

    Whether it was marital idolatry, maternal idolatry, financial security, or the subtle, daily reliance on relational validation, the Holy Spirit brought me to a distinct, unshakeable realization: The only shoulders created strong enough to bear the weight of worship are the shoulders of God.

    Every other god we set up- every human being, every career title, every financial asset, every spiritual leader, and every demonic entity- will eventually fail, crumble, and pale in comparison. They simply lack the structural engineering to receive and host worship.

    1. Why Created Things Break Under Worship

    We often assume that spiritual darkness craves worship because it knows how to handle it. But if Satan or his demonic hierarchy could truly process worship, wouldn’t they have become good by now?

    They can’t. The realm of darkness is completely incapable of receiving worship, which is why the Fruits of the Spirit act as direct spiritual warfare against idolatry.

    When you heap coals of fire on an enemy’s head by extending true, godly kindness or love to a demonized or unmanaged atmosphere, the situation often seems to spike in friction before it breaks. Why? Because the demonic spirit cannot consume or hold the weight of prolonged exposure to divine virtue. The fruit of the Spirit opposes anything outside of Yahweh, Elohim, El Shaddai, Christ Jesus that demands an altar.

    No human shoulder, no animal shoulder, no inanimate object, and no demonic shoulder was ever built to carry the weight of an altar. When you place a human being on an altar, you aren’t honouring them- you are crushing them under a load they were never engineered to bear.

    2. The Witchcraft Illusion & The Unstoppable Flow of True Worship

    You can see this exact structural failure play out in the natural world when people resort to witchcraft.

    Consider how people go to witch doctors or occult practitioners to have “love spells” or manipulative charms cast on someone else. Through spiritual manipulation, they force that target into feelings and commitments they would have never chosen on their own. But observe what happens when the spell takes hold: the victim begins to respond in absolute, intense devotion to the person who commissioned the spell.

    And what does the person who requested the spell do? They start running. They panic, hide, and eventually call the police or seek legal protection to stop the very affection they forced into existence.

    Why? Because when you are confronted with the true depth and wealth of worship—even when you forced it through manipulation—you quickly discover that you are not built to handle it. The weight of another human being’s total devotion suffocates a mortal frame. You cannot stop the spiritual floodgate you illegally opened, so you run to human authorities to shield you from the monster of your own making.

    Contrast this with what happens when a believer decides to get serious with God and worship Him in spirit and in truth.

    When you begin to truly worship the Father—not simply because He has been good to you, but because He IS good—a wellspring opens up that cannot be contained. That revelation produces a perpetual, unstoppable flow of adoration.

    And unlike a panicked human or a fragile idol, God has no desire or need to stop your worship. His shoulders are built to carry it. His shoulders were engineered in eternity to receive, enjoy, and host the full weight of glory without buckling or retreating.

    3. The Stalker Diagnostic: When Human Ego Desires an Altar

    As human beings, we like the idea of being worshipped—until we experience what it actually feels like.

    A stalker is a direct diagnostic tool to reveal the hidden desire for self-idolatry.

    It exposes the latent part of the human soul that wants to be a god to itself, to be adored, needed, and centered.

    Many people have experienced being stalked or obsessively pursued simply for being kind. But if we audit those encounters honestly, how often were we truly yoked to the Holy Spirit before engaging?

    Did we ask: “Lord, what is Your specific instruction for this person right now? Should I engage, or should I step back?”

    We often make executive decisions in our day-to-day interactions without realizing we are not the Executive. God is the sole Executive of our lives. When we step out of His direct instruction to dispense our own unmanaged “kindness,” we step out of His hedge of protection.

    A simple smile to the wrong person- like the famous case of Laura Black, whose workplace smile resulted in years of deadly obsession- can trigger a nightmare if we operate on human autopilot rather than divine alignment. Being cordial is a baseline, but assuming we can manage people without the Father’s instruction is self-idolatry in action.

    4. The Architecture of Demonic Matchmakers

    This brings us to a heavy spiritual reality: The Ministry of Demonic Matchmakers.

    Satan holds a detailed ledger of the sin nature and generational iniquity in your bloodline, as well as the bloodline of others. Iniquity operates like a remote-controlled frequency. The adversary can turn up the dial on an individual’s latent obsessive nature, insecurity, or predatory drive- using someone you barely know to target you.

    If you walk through life without asking the Executive for direction in every encounter, you leave your gates unmonitored.

    This is why we do not leave our homes without blessing ourselves, covering our atmosphere in the Blood of Jesus, and aligning our steps. We do not know what spirits sponsor the people we pass on the street, in our offices, or on our social media feeds. We must be governed in every moment.

    The Tactical Soul Audit: Altar Inspection

    Take 10 minutes today to walk into your internal warehouse and run this diagnostic check:

    1. Who or what in my life am I forcing to bear the weight of worship? (e.g., Expecting a spouse, a friend, or a career to give me the security only God provides)
    2. Where have I made “executive decisions” in my relationships without consulting the true Executive?
    3. Am I using unmanaged human kindness to build my own ego rather than yielding to the Holy Spirit’s precise instructions?

    The Executive Proclamation

    “Father, Yahweh, Elohim, El Shaddai, my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, I acknowledge today that You alone are the Executive of my life. I repent for placing any human being, relationship, or personal desire on the altar of worship. I strip every illegal title from my mind and declare that no created thing shall bear the weight that belongs strictly to You. I cover my going out and my coming in with the Blood of Jesus. Cancel every assignment of demonic matchmaking, obsessive targetings, and unholy attachments over my bloodline. Order my steps, guard my mouth, and let Your Spirit alone govern my interactions. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

    Take the Work Off the Airwaves

    • Listen to the Deep-Dive: Tune in to Episode 12: The Architecture of Covenant & Counterfeits on the Sincere Milk & Solid Food podcast to learn how to identify demonic matchmakers and audit your spiritual alignments. [Listen on Spotify / Apple Podcasts]
    • Do the Deep Work: Visit www.sinceremilksolidfood.org to grab your copy of Guided Journal: Vol 1 to process your soul audits, dismantle personal idolatry, and keep your altars clean! [Shop the Bookstore]
    • Are You Ready for Solid Food? Join our waitlist for The Believer’s Life Cycle book and receive Chapter 1 free! [Join the Waitlist]

  • The Unspoken Exit: Overcoming Relational Idolatry and Learning to Finish Well

    The Unspoken Exit: Overcoming Relational Idolatry and Learning to Finish Well

    For most of my life, I operated under a silent, exhausting pattern: I faced persistent rejection from people I deeply wanted close relationships with. Because I so desperately wanted to be present in their lives, I went out of my way to cater to them, perform, and people-please just to earn a seat at their table.

    It never worked. They still didn’t want me around.

    When you grow up internalizing rejection, you develop survival blueprints. You convince yourself that if you can just be useful enough, agreeable enough, or quiet enough, people won’t leave. But “Solid Food” maturity requires looking at your internal warehouse and recognising when a pattern is no longer serving your Kingdom calling- it is exposing an altar of Relational Idolatry.

    1. The Agreement That Was Broken

    A couple of years ago, after going through a painful relational breakdown that left me reeling in my mind, I sat down with one of my closest friends. I wanted to protect our connection from ending in the same traumatic, silent way.

    I told her plainly:

    “Listen, if anything ever happens between us and you feel the need to move on, I will not hold you back. I genuinely want the best for you, even if the best for you is my absence. All I ask is that you tell me. Let’s have an honest conversation and end this on a good note, because sudden cut-offs leave me in a bad place mentally. Just give us the opportunity to finish properly.”

    She listened, supported me, and agreed.

    Fast forward two years. Out of nowhere, she did the exact thing I had asked her not to do. I reached out on her birthday to wish her well. I was able to send the message, but shortly after- likely realising she had overlooked that line of communication- she quietly blocked me across her social media. There was no conversation, no explanation of a wrong done, and no closure.

    Initially, the old childhood blueprint wanted to kick in: What did I do wrong? How did I fail?

    2. The Shift: Nothing Bad Happened

    Then came a profound, Holy Spirit-inspired shift in my mindset.

    I had to come to the realization that she didn’t block me because something catastrophic happened or because a fight took place. She blocked me simply because she didn’t want the relationship anymore- and nothing adverse had to occur to justify her exit.

    We live in a culture that assumes a relationship can only end if there is a massive blow-up, a betrayal, or a scandal. But the truth is, people sometimes just need to move on without you, and as mature believers, we have to be okay with that.

    God Himself models this profound level of respect for human agency. Humanity rejects Him continuously. It breaks His heart, yet in His sovereignty, He allows us the freedom to walk away, explore what we want to explore, and experience our choices, while remaining an unshakeable mainstay if we ever choose to return.

    If God does not force His presence on those who wish to leave, why do we fight so hard to force our presence on people who have silently chosen their exit?

    3. Dismantling Relational Idolatry

    This experience forced me to confront a deep root in my heart: Relational Idolatry.

    When you suffer from relational idolatry, you place human beings on altars meant exclusively for God. You trust in the arm of flesh, treating specific people as your emotional mainstays, your validation, or your security. But Scripture warns us explicitly that the arm of flesh will fail (Jeremiah 17:5).

    God will intentionally allow certain relationships to break- not to destroy you, but to dismantle the idols you built out of them. He is reminding you that people are meant to be loved and stewarded, but He alone is your Mainstay.

    Does this mean if she ever came back, I would restore the friendship to what it was? Honestly, no. While I would be cordial, loving, and able to communicate up to a point, she would no longer occupy that “mainstay” position in my life. Moving people from the “Front Row” of your heart to the “Balcony” isn’t malice; it’s wisdom and boundary stewardship.

    4. The Spirit of a Finisher: Finishing Well

    Ecclesiastes 7:8 tells us that “The end of a thing is better than its beginning.”

    It is easy to start a friendship with excitement, but it takes spiritual maturity to have the spirit of a finisher– to end things well.

    To my friend who cut me off and blocked me without a word: I still love you, I truly appreciate you, and I thank you.

    You helped me realize that our relationship ended in a space where nothing adverse happened. God allowed it to come to a close quietly, freeing me from the need for human closure and delivering me from the trap of needing to be wanted by everyone. We ended well because the season simply reached its ordained conclusion.

    The Tactical Soul Audit: Idolatry & Closure Check

    Take 10 minutes today to sit in your quiet space and answer these diagnostic questions:

    1. Where am I currently fighting to stay in a space or relationship where my presence is no longer desired?
    2. Have I turned a human connection into a “mainstay,” relying on their approval rather than God’s unshakeable acceptance?
    3. Can I give someone the grace to walk away without needing them to be a “villain” to justify the end of the season?

    The Executive Proclamation

    “Father, I repent for every instance where I placed a human relationship on the altar that belongs strictly to You. I lay down the need to perform, cater, or beg for space in rooms where I am not received. Thank You for being my ultimate Mainstay. I release every person who has moved on from my life- without bitterness, without retaliation, and without demand for explanation. I choose to finish well, keeping my heart soft, my boundaries clean, and my eyes fixed entirely on You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

    Take the Work Off the Airwaves

    • Do the Deep Work: Grab your physical copy of Guided Journal: Vol 1 to process your soul audits, dismantle relational idolatry, and write out your internal boundaries. [Shop the Bookstore]
    • Are You Ready for Solid Food? Visit www.sinceremilksolidfood.org to read our deep-dive articles, explore our study guides, and join the waitlist for The Believer’s Life Cycle book! [Join the Waitlist]